I’ve decided I need to change the blog design. Since I’m still trying to figure out this Wordpress stuff… well, let’s just say I’m NOT figuring it all out! 
At least not quickly enough for me!
In the meantime, please disregard the mess and know that I’ll be working on everything for the next few days. Thanks!
…it really slips by! This week has flown by like a roller coaster!! I completely forgot to check in over at the HYC. What?!
My sister and her husband left on Monday morning to MOVE to Houston. I worried about them the whole day. Work has been kind of slow, but when it gets like that my boss gets crazy and starts making stuff up for us to do. Just chaotic around there. That on top of all the work from my second job.
And to top things off, remember me talking about taking photos of a friend who’s getting married? I forgot that tomorrow is their rehearsal dinner - which I’m photographing! The wedding is on Sunday so I think I just had it in my head that the rehearsal was going to be on Saturday. I think my batteries are all charged but I need to check tonight. I also need to lay some clothes out to wear. At least I have that one pair of black pants and one nice top!
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As far as my dieting goes, I haven’t’ been as “on it” as I should have been. I did weigh myself on Monday morning and I was at 228. Down .5 from last weigh-in. I’ll take that. Saturday I’m going to get back on that treadmill and start paying attention to my food again! Saturday!
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Good luck to all of you - I hope you’ve been doing well and staying positive. Keep it up!!
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I had said that I was going to post a photo of that friend who’s getting married… here’s one in front of an old, abandoned gas station:
While I’m so excited, I also kind of feel sad because the only reason she and my BIL are visiting is because they’re on their way to Texas - on their way to moving to Texas. She’s so excited about the house that she and K just bought, even with all the problems it’s come with. But I’ll see her even less than I do now. So, I’m excited for her, sad for me. 
Now for the reason I’m posting… which, now that I think about it, is a pretty shallow concern of mine! But let’s go with it with the understanding that I love my sister much more than I dread being seen in public.
Ok, so R calls and says that they want to go Downtown on Saturday. She and K want me to go with them. Now I’m not sure if they’re talking about Downtown during the day or Downtown at night. Either way, this is causing me minor panic attacks. (Not really, but I’m feeling more and more insecure the more I think about it.) And the really pathetic part is that all of my concerns have to do with clothing and “what the hell am I going to wear?!?”.
I’ve noticed that the only time I feel actual stress about how I look and what I wear is when R is around. I feel like a potato when I’m around her, all dull and lumpy with bad skin. (HA! That comparison makes me want to laugh really hard and then cry a little!) I’m sure I haven’t always felt this way, but I can’t remember when that was.
She’s so beautiful - beautiful face, tall, and although she’s put some weight on recently she carries hers differently than I do my extra poundage. She has gorgeous hair and eyes and everything she wears looks fantastic on her!
So I don’t know what to wear when I go out with her on Saturday and I can’t believe I’m this worried about it! Except that I really don’t have very many nice clothes anymore. I wear jeans and t-shirts to work everyday. I have one pair of black pants that I wear when I need to dress up. I normally wear a black cami and a deep pink blouse over that (I love layers!). I refuse to wear sleeveless because the backs of my arms are all blotchy. So that’s it. That’s what I feel comfortable in.
The problem is this - if we go out during the day it’s already too hot to wear that outfit and if we go out at night, well, it’s a little too “mature” looking. Downtown is a college town. People wearing hardly anything at all is pretty normal, day and night.
I looked on Lane Bryant’s website but nothing I get from there ever really fits right. I like the jeans but that’s about it. Tops are so hard for me to find.
Ugh. I just read all that above and I really sound ridiculous. Maybe I’m just focusing on this issue so I don’t dwell on the fact that R will be what’s essentially the equivalent of half a US of A away!
Ok, so let’s just call this a venting and I’ll try to get over myself!
I promise! Oh, I’m still on track with my diet plan. It’s my weigh-in and everyday schedule that’s throwing me right now. I know the weigh-in for HYC is on Tuesdays but I’m keeping track of my weight for 2 other things and they’re all on different days! I decided to make it easier on myself (i.e. my sanity) and so I’m only going to keep track of my weight on Fridays. I think that’s a good day. If I lose it might help keep me motivated on weekends, which tends to be my most challenging time.
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I’m still working on my new design for the site here. It’s slow going as I don’t seem to have much free time. Between my day job and my part-time-job-turning-a-second-full-time-job and needing to fit in a little exercise and a little sleep? I’m exhausted!
I’ll get there. I’m using this as an exercise to teach myself a little patience. 
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I also just wanted to tell you all that I really appreciate the comments you’ve left and especially the inspiration I get when I read all of your blog posts. This is a hard journey we’re on and having a support system nearby makes it seem a little less scary. So in honor of that, and in honor of all you moms out there, I put together a little bookmark you can download and print out for yourselves. I found the message in a recent Woman’s World magazine and found that I was able to apply it to so many people in my life. Enjoy it and share it!
Or at least, a busy Saturday! I was up early to go with a friend and her sister for a “photo shoot”. What a great time! Really, I don’t think I’ve had so much fun in a a while! Once I get some of the photos edited I’ll post a couple of them - probably not until next weekend though.
After the shoot I went home, ate a little bit for lunch and then went to the movies with my mom and a friend to see Made of Honor. We went straight home after the movie and I hopped in the shower to get ready for a bachelorette party! It was kind of a laid back, just hangin’ out party so I didn’t have to worry too much about being late… although I was late and I really hate to be late.
I was supposed to go to a rose festival today but I just couldn’t muster up the energy. It’s in the town that I work in (about an hour away) and it just would have eaten up my whole day. I had so much I needed to get done here at home - the price I had to pay for playing on Saturday!
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A really quick note about the movie - it’s cute, it kind of follows along with the the prescribed romantic comedy guidelines, it’s got Patrick Dempsey… So all in all, I liked it. I don’t know if I’m being too sensitive but the stereotypes it emphasized (and in some ways over-exaggerated) bothered me! From the overweight bridesmaid determined to fit into a smaller dress to the gorgeous bridesmaid that tries sleeping with the men in the bridal party. Granted, neither of these characters took up the majority of the movie but it still bugged me.
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On a more weighty issue…
I’ve still been looking up motivation tips and inspirational sayings, etc. I don’t know if they help you but I find a beautifully written encouraging paragraph to be so motivating! I have several things that I want to share with all of you. I’m going to wait though - probably until Tuesday. I don’t want them to get lost amidst a bunch of my ramblings!
I do have a link to share though. I bought a magazine last week that I hadn’t read before - Body+Soul Magazine. It’s a Martha Stewart publication and it has some very interesting articles. Two of my favorites from the current issue are A Beginner’s Guide to Organic Gardening and a Q&A from readers to the magazine by answered by two veterinarians. Essentially, get your pet’s teeth cleaned.
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I hope you all have a great Monday! I’ll see you at weigh-in on Tuesday!
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